Creating After Abuse is ready for printing

Uncategorized Apr 06, 2021



Creating After Abuse: My New Book Is Coming Soon!

"What if everything in your past was a post-traumatic growth possibility?" - Dr. Lisa Cooney 

This month's blog posts are dedicated to Creating After Abuse, my forthcoming new book! 

The book is divided into three parts: 

- Locked in the Cage of Abuse

- Struggling in the Cage

- Escaping the Cage — Beyond Abuse & Living Radically Alive 

I started writing the book to take you within the bars of my own Cage. 

And what do I mean by the Cage?


The Cage

When you suffer abuse life takes on new qualities afterwards, but they are invisible. Rules come out of nowhere, things are prohibited, don't go there, don't try that. 

Abuse imposes confines on life afterwards, and the abuse survivor is the last to know. 

I frequently talk about myths someone takes on after abuse. One of them is "there is no choice." Even knee-jerk reactions to life seem unavoidable. Maybe for you it's running away from intimacy, or rebelling against loving work situations, or habitually isolating. 

Healing abuse means dissolving these limitations, choosing freedom, choosing the wider world that begins outside the Cage.


Seeing the Cage 

This all raises the question: how do you even see something as subtle as the Cage? It's invisible! 

It's true. It's almost a moment of grace to see those hard metal bars of confusion. 

Something just feels wrong, though. 

Maybe it's a persistent ache, something in a certain part of your body. Maybe it's a moment of noticing you're falling behind where your heart craves to go. 

Chronic discomforts, physical or spiritual - those are the traces of the Cage. 

Painful beliefs - those are the cold metal bars of the Cage. 

I'll leave you with a cliffhanger. 

The starting point for leaving the Cage is learning to embrace the Cage, to curl your fingers around its unyielding hardness and find acceptance of it, even gratitude. 

And then it’s a matter of taking that wet, heavy, stinky blanket off you and looking at it and demanding something different. 

What is that demand? 


To COMMAND with ferocity that ‘what was’ will not define you today! 

You’ve got the power. It’s in your choice. 

Nothing in your past - not even abuse - can take that away

Your choice is everlasting…are you using it today?


CLICK HERE to learn more about Creating After Abuse.


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