I remember the first time I saw my bank account literally at zero, that’s $0.00…yes it’s true and as I stared at my computer screen frozen in fear, I started to panic. I went to hyper-vigilant supercharged-planning to get myself out of that zero balance…and then I paused, took a few deep breaths, put my hand on my chest and said, “Ok, so this is what THAT feels like.”
I then asked questions like,
“Did the world end?”
“Am I going to die?”
“Is someone coming to take me away?”
Each of these questions came back with a big NO! It was just a moment in time that WOKE ME UP to the tape in my head that said, “I am a zero, I am nothing, and I deserve no-thing.”
Clearly I had some serious issues with believing in the wealth of my being.
Clearly, I was hell bent on destroying things vs. creating things.
Clearly, I had some unconscious computations running my life?
Are you noticing any of...
Break Free from the Invisible Cage
We’re revolutionizing the way one lives with abuse. That means moving beyond it, not disconnecting with it.
Embrace your story and know what it is.
During abuse, your young self may have used the 4 D’s as coping strategies, to try and protect yourself from pain.
These 4 D’s act as the four walls of our invisible cage that we live in. It allows us to not create the reality, the life we desire in this reality. When we’re boxed in, we can’t generate anything beyond what’s inside the cage. We become our own perpetrator and victim simultaneously.
Within this cage, we create a fantasy reality.
The fantasy is controlled by you. It’s safe. Only you have the key to get in. However, that fantasy limits your choices only to the cage of that reality.
These coping strategies may have helped you at the time of pain when you were younger, but using these behaviors to cope as an adult...
Would you like to break free from the cage of abuse yet you feel stuck, wondering why anyone, yourself, would choose to live inside the cage of abuse?
Over time, living inside the cage of abuse becomes familiar. The feelings of worthlessness, the repeated patterns of “not enough” or “less than” in all areas of your life: health, relationship and wealth.
When you begin the journey of moving beyond abuse, and leaving the cage, something quite surprising occurs. The freedom, pleasure and possibility you experience is so unfamiliar that it can feel shocking, scary, crazy, and all you want to do is crawl back into the cage.
Because the cage is what you know. The cage is what feels safe. You grab hold of the bars and become more rigid, more confined.
How do you leave the cage once and for all without it feeling so painful?
You start with these 3 steps:
Step 1: Acknowledge the Pattern
The biggest problem is returning to the cage and going unconscious again....
If you’ve ever experienced abuse (physical, sexual, emotional, physical, mental), most likely you view money like you view life: as a perpetrator.
(You can read more about viewing life through abuse-colored glasses in my blog post, Is Your View Skewed? ( The Impact Of Abuse)
The effects of abuse are pervasive. Even if the abuse ended decades ago, it can still feel like you’re living in a cage, a prison cell. Only now, money is the perpetrator, the jailer.
You may struggle with anxiety or depression and money has become a source of your angst.
You may have experienced financial abuse growing up and think it’s normal to feel helpless and powerless financially.
You may struggle to create the life that you really desire yet it seems like it’s money’s fault that you’re not. You’re constantly saying, “I can’t afford it,” and “If only I had the money for that…”
You may also have the money you require but struggle...
There was a time when Cory believed she was crazy. Stories of abuse and a family empty of joy, kindness, and sharing chased each other through her cluttered mind. It didn’t help that her sisters denied that the abuse ever happened and made her feel very “wrong” for even speaking about it. Cory was not only rejected by her family, she rejected herself and her body. In fact, when Cory came to see me, she was very much at war with her body.
It is common for those who have suffered from the effects of abuse to feel alienated from his or her body. It is not a place of safety, peace, and comfort. Instead it’s an object of ridicule and judgment.
Much of the work I do is body based. That is, I work on the mind by helping to create a bridge of awareness to the body. In this way, I am able to help the client clear trauma on subconscious level by working deeply with the thoughts, attitudes, and beliefs that are continuing to create a sense of...
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